The longest basi ride of my life…

As one of my frens commented via sms yesterday, “U sure are lovin’ those basi, eh?”….
Wise ass.
I don’t like riding basi. They’re slow. They ain’t quick. And they tend to drop you off in the middle of nowhere. It’s not like taking rail where the stops are usually downtown or flying where often the airports are out in the middle of nowhere but you got to nowhere quickly. Basi are often the only option (like getting to OAK early in the AM) or the cheapest option (getting from DC to NY) to get somewhere.
They’re collectively called the Chinatown Bus (shouldn’t it be called the basi?) and there are several companies that run travel coaches between Chinatowns in Boston, NYC, Philly and DC.
An entire subculture has sprung up around these buses and if you pick up a copy of any alternative weekly out here, chances are you will find a story or two about the horrors (erm, I mean “adventure”) of riding the Chinatown Basi.
So how did yours truly, the obsessed travel planner, wind up on the Chinatown Basi? Well, A, by not knowing that AA charges to use your miles and B, trying to save money, like I do on overseas trips.
When I travel domestically, It’s just like being home, except the sun wakes up on the wrong side of the bed. I tend to travel like I would in SF too because it’s that familiar.
The airline shuttles charge over US$200 r/t if you purchase 3 weeks in advance. Amtrak has similar pricing (like that’s going to grab travellers from the airlines, thanks Amtrak!). But the basi charges US$35 round trip! And if you figure the time it takes to get to the airport, the one hour in advance you gotta cool your heels for there, the flight and then getting into town from LGA, it’s sorta like 4 hours, right? Whattabargain, right? Well….

This is the basi station…
I get to the “bus station” at 1730 after having a light supper of an ham & cheese sandwich, chips and a pint o’ Guinness.

Mmmmmm, Guinnessssssss
Every Chinatown should have a beeg Irish Pub…

Eats AND Drinks
I was thinking that this would tide me over on the basi trip until we made it to the rest stop midway through the trip.
Yeah right.
I queued up with a small crowd that soon morphed into a larger crowd. And as the time went from 1730 to 1830 to 1930, the crowd was getting itchy. Especially since the “customer service rep” was a bum. Literally.

A nice well behaved mob
Anyhoo, when the 1800 basi finally arrived after 2000, people were cranky and tired. And we were all pissed too! The basi discharged it’s load of prisoners and tried to back into the “bus station”. This was a 20 minute maneuver, including close calls with three cars, one attendant and a fence that looks like it’s been hit before (movie coming soon).

“back back back back STOP STOP STOP whamwhamwham”
Up the sidewalk, and into a fence. And out. And in. And out. Waitaminnit, this is supposed to be a PG-13 rated blog!

I’d hate to own this house…
I can just wonder about the thoughts going through this woman’s mind as the basi came within inches of taking out her door. Of course she DID have a parking space, so maybe that’s why she hung tough…

“this bozo’s gonna hit me, I just know it…”
Doesn’t fill me with the greatest confidence. Maybe this guy should go to HKG and learn how to drive a Citybus double decker. Now those guys are good drivers lah.
After the basi ballet, we finally piled onto the basi. (note: if you ever try this ride to death, get a seat in the front of the basi, unless you wanna smell the horribly maintained toilet in the back). Then the driver had to eat. To his credit, he ate rather quickly, noting the presence of a simmering mob in his basi.

The ride was nothing to complain about, once we got on the road. Sensing the anger in his basi, the driver proceeded to drive over 70 the entire time, getting us to NYC in 4.5 hours with no rest stop. Since there was no rest stop, I (and the rest of the bus) either were hungry (for those of us who didn’t bring food) or asleep.
We finally arrive in NYC’s Chinatown “basi station” a bit after 0100, delayed by the Holland Tunnel having only one lane open. And naturally, the “basi station” is waaaaaaay on the opposite side of Chinatown, where there’s no Subway stop nearby. Of course lah!
Straggling to the subway stop, I relent and share a cab with a fellow basi victim. She’s going to Harlem. I’m going to the Upper East Side. We split the cab. I get to my fren’s place. She’s awake (keeps west coast time, apparently), gracious and verrry patient. An absolute rock star. Wound up eating an omelet at 0230 while catching up.
And that’s half of my adventures riding the Chinatown Basi. Except for getting into NYC THREE FRACKING HOURS LATE, it’s no worse than transport I’ve taken on mainland China…
Of course, this ain’t mainland China so I expect a bit more…
Hopefully, the other half of the ride (back to DC) won’t be as eventful.

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